Crooked Finger (crookedfingers) wrote,
Crooked Finger
crookedfingers

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Morality Play

It is in the flow of my days on earth 8:29 PM Tuesday evening. My wife has faithfully gone off to work. I am once again alone with my thoughts. I have basically stopped watching any TV at night. I rather either read my books or sit and think or review my life from birth August 1952 till Now December 8, 2015. We are going to the end of another year.

I had a super quiet day today. I love quiet days. As I look over my life I can see that what tension that has come into my life has been caused by having to be with people or someone. The only person I really feel comfortable with totally is my wife. I know even though my wife and I are different she accepts me for who I am. I am not afraid to be myself with my wife. I do not have to be afraid my wife will reject me. In the past I can see I forced myself to be with people even though inside I was feeling insecure-freaked-waiting to be attacked-defensive etc. . . I think this reality about myself is one of the reasons I was never ordained to be a Gospel Minister. I am not a social animal. I am very shy and hypersensitive. I can see a certain pattern of behavior throughout my life from childhood to now being an old man. In the past I forced myself to be with someone out of not wanting to be alone/wanting love/sex/company down inside a black hole of despair. With my wife all the walls that I surrounded myself with have come down and with my wife I feel united totally physically and spiritually. My wife and I are one flesh. The Lord has used my wife to channel rich blessings into my life here on this old creation/earth. I have experienced the love of God with my wife over the many years we have been married.

Today I finished reading the novel "Amy and Isabelle" by Elizabeth Strout. I have been thinking of doing a book review of the novel in my YouTube channel. The problem is that I am not good at reviewing a novel that I have read. I thought of writing on something and then reading it on a video. I do not know. Maybe it is not such a big deal doing a book review.

I see the novel "Amy and Isabelle" by Strout as a morality play. What I mean is that what is played out in the novel is the struggle between good and evil in a small town called Shirley Falls. I could write pages on this topic, but why when no one will read what I write here. It would be a waste of time and energy to expand these reflections about the struggle of good and evil taking place in this novel.

In the mail this afternoon I received a used book/novel I had ordered titled, "Monkey's Uncle" a novel by Jenny Diski.

Jenny Diski
http://www.jennydiski.co.uk/index.html
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jenny_Diski
http://www.lrb.co.uk/v37/n22/jenny-diski/wholl-be-last

I got a phone call from a volunteer from the Herrick District Public Library this afternoon asking me if I could cover for her from 10 AM till 1 PM, I said Sure. So tomorrow I will go to the library book nook to help people with their used materials and maybe I find some good used books to bring home to add to our library. I already have several used books set aside at the book nook to bring home if I do not see anything else to bring home.

Well I suppose I will close to read and listen to my CD's. Existence keeps speeding by!

old diary entry no shadow of death there
http://glorycloud.diaryland.com/021109_44.html

"[21] And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
[22] And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
[23] And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
[24] Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
[25] And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed." Genesis 2:21-25
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