Crooked Finger (crookedfingers) wrote,
Crooked Finger

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when will this society debauched in mind, body, and soul finally meet its end

It is 9:39 AM Monday morning in the flow of existence. I am always wondering when this existence will sputter out.

I got up this morning sometime after 7 o'clock AM. I did not sweat as much last night. Maybe I did not sweat as much because my wife's warm body was not next to me. It is not a pleasant thought knowing when I am in the ground my wife will not be next to me. Being alone is hell.

When I got up this morning I made myself a pot of coffee and then messed with our main computer. In the mornings I read blogs in LiveJournal and Diaryland. I looked at World News and wept. World News is for me soul crushing.

As I was cooking myself breakfast Carol called from Boston Mass. She was up but Caleb and Emily were still sleeping. It has been storming in Boston she told me. Students were moving in everywhere she told me. Where Caleb and Emily live there are students living in apartments. Carol did not know how to make coffee according to Caleb's method. Emily is due date to have their baby is Sept. 3rd. So Carol and I talked on the phone like old married couples. I wanted to say all the things young lovers say but my tongue was tied. Love is painful.

I was going to mow the lawn this morning but lost my drive. I was going to take Rudy for a walk but lost my will.

So here I sit drinking coffee waiting it out.

Last night I read my books and watched some television. I read before falling asleep a novel I am almost finished reading titled, "Austerlitz" a novel by W. G. Sebald. I also read last night, "Flaubert: A Biography" by Frederick Brown.

I will close to wait for a blue moon to appear in the night sky.

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