June 27th, 2018

trying to reach a state of mind that was completely empty – something I'm still striving for

It is in the ongoing death flow 9:18 AM Wednesday morning. It is gray damp misty wet ugly morning here in west Michigan. A good day to shoot tin cans off a tree stump.

I got up this morning around 6:15 AM. A weird religious dream woke me up so I decided I would get up. I told myself as I was getting up if it gets too rough I can always take a nap sometime during the day. One of the blessings of being retired is that you can lay down anytime your body decides it is sick of being awake in this dead american world.

So I got up made a pot of coffee and then messed with our main computer. After messing with our main computer I made myself some oatmeal for breakfast. Carol got home from work around 8:33 AM and has gone to bed to sleep awhile. She is off tonight and tomorrow night from work.

I have nothing to do today worth doing. Lately I can't seem to get into anything spiritual in the mornings. I am tired I suppose. Last night I read my newest book titled, 'Swans Sacrifice And Transcendence: The Oral History' by Nick Soulsby. I have been listening to the music of the Swans for many years/Michael Gira/Angels of Light.

Well do not know what else to write this morning. I suppose I will close to face the music.


  • Current Music
    Swans 'Filth'

getting my July 2018 Paper Diary ready

'Swans Sacrifice And Transcendence: The Oral History' by Nick Soulsby

"I had been obsessed with the media's-not that the media is one entity or one conspiracy-colonization of our consciousness and its formulation of the anxieties that compel one to consume: a recent phenomenon that didn't begin until the end of the Second World War, when advertising and production amped up abd corporations had to create need. It had a lot to do with having all these factories that needed to do something, so they began manufacturing anxiety in people so they would consume products. Nowadays, that equation is rampantly out of control, culminating in the probable destruction of the planet and the species-all the horrible social effects from mass media on our consciousness and our sense of who we are on the planet. I felt this whole process, along with working as a low-level wage slave for most of my life, was akin to being raped: being invaded against your will by stimuli over which you have no control, and where you've helpless as it impinges on your consciousness. I carried that sort of imagery on for some time and then grew weary of it because it became a cliche in its own right to harp on such things" Michael Gira pg.80,81
  • Current Mood
    contemplative contemplative