June 2nd, 2014

the fear of the terrifying primal father

It is 12:58 PM Monday early afternoon. It seems lately the days go on forever and ever. It is like time has slowed down to a crawl, which is fine with me. I just wonder why the days seem so long lately.

It is another hot humid day here by Lake Michigan. We still have on the central air system. We are suppose to have a thunder storm this afternoon. We need rain right now because everything is dry. I can already see brown areas on our front lawn. Every day I water my wildflowers and other plants around our house.

I got up this morning around 6 o'clock AM. I feel tired and I could easily go to sleep this afternoon. My wife has gone to bed for the day.

This morning I did all the usual things. This morning we took Rudy for a walk at Dunton Park which is here in Holland located by Lake Macatawa. After walking our dog Rudy we visited thrift stores so I could look at their used books. I found no used books today to add to our library.

I have not read anything today. I have written a couple of pages in my paper diary today. I am out of it mentally these days. I am tired.

Lately I have been mainly reading from these two books, "The Denial of Death" by Ernest Becker and "The World of Yesterday" A Memoir by Stefan Zweig.

Well since I feel wasted I will close to wander the house.
  • Current Music
    Baroness "Yellow & Green"

people create the reality they need in order to discover themselves

It is Now in the flow of my life 5:10 PM Monday early evening. I am down in the lower level or what some would call an open basement. Our home is build a slight incline and our basement opens up to our back yard. I like having windows around me down here in the lower level. Also there are two doors that open up into our back yard. Out one window down here I can see my wildflower garden. God is good. Carol and I are home owners. My wife tells me in three years this house will be paid for. To be honest with you I am always expecting our home to catch on fire and burn to the ground. I am always expecting the worse. The Lord's mercies are new every morning.

I have had thus far a normal day. I did lay down for an hour this afternoon down here. I got up around 3:10 PM this afternoon. I checked our mail box and found nothing exciting. I am expecting in the mail books and CD's. That reminds me I need to apply for Social Security soon so as to pay for books and CD's. We come into the world with nothing and we leave the world with nothing. I remember these words in The Book of Job, "And he said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, And naked shall I return there. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; Blessed be the name of the LORD" Job 2:21.

My wife works tonight from 12 o'clock Midnight till 6 o'clock AM.

All I have attempted to read today is the book "The Denial Of Death" by Ernest Becker. I do not know if there is anything on TV worth watching tonight. If there is nothing on TV worth tonight I will withdraw to my study and read my books. Existence keeps speeding by!

I thought of quoting "The Denial Of Death" by Becker but not in the mood right now. This book is worth reading especially for Christians who want something to think about as mankind goes insane.

I like to read something else besides my secular books, but I can't get into anything spiritual. I thought tonight what I could do is just read the Holy Bible. Recently I bought these Christian books I should read them before the Second Coming of Christ Jesus.

"The Heresy of Orthodoxy: How Contemporary Culture's Fascination with Diversity Has Reshaped Our Understanding of Early Christianity" by Michael J. Kruger

"Paul the Missionary: Realities, Strategies and Methods" by Eckhard J. Schinabel

"Constructing Jesus: Memory, Imagination, and History" by Dale C. Allison Jr.

"Handbook on the New Testament Use of the Old Testament: Exegesis And Interpretation" by G. K. Beale

"The Final Days Of Jesus: The Most Important Week Of The Most Important Person Who Ever Lived" by Andreas J. Kostenberger & Justin Taylor

"From Creation to New Creation: Biblical Theology and Exegesis" Essays In Honor Of G. K. Beale Editors Daniel M. Gurtner & Benjamin L. Gladd

"Paul the Convert: The Apostolate and Apostasy of Saul the Pharisee" by Alan F. Segal

"Acts" New Testament VI [Reformation Commentary On Scripture] Edited By Esther Chung-Kim & Todd R. Hains

"Acts: Exegetical Commentary" Introduction And 1:1-2:27 Volume 1 by Craig S. Keener

"Acts: Exegetical Commentary 3:1-4:28" Volume 2 by Craig S. Keener

"The Acts of the Risen Lord Jesus: Luke's account of God's unfolding plan" by Alan J. Thompson

"The Acts Of The Apostle" [The Pillar New Testament Commentary] by David G. Peterson

"Acts" [Baker Exegetical Commentary On The New Testament] by Darrell L. Bock

"A Theology Of Luke And Acts: God's Promised Program, Realized for All Nations" by Darrell L. Bock

Well I sure have enough to read. I suppose I will close to see what is happening upstairs. Existence keeps speeding by!
  • Current Mood
    contemplative contemplative