March 23rd, 2014

pure wildness

It is 7:34 AM Sunday morning. I am waking up to a new week. This week I will be absolutely alone. I might not even go outside this week except to feed the birds. Well I do have a dentist appointment Thursday to have my teeth clean. Also this coming Thursday I am suppose to get together with a friend for breakfast. I might visit thrift stores this week in search of used books to add to our library. Right now outside it is dark and extremely cold. It is suppose to snow and rain this week.

This morning as I sat in our living room I was remembering when I was a young man. I got married when I was in my late 20's. I was either 27 or 28 years old when Carol and I got married. I am six months older than my wife. Before I married Carol the women I had relationships with were always older than me.

When I was young I was wild. What I mean by being wild was that I was fully aware of my flesh. The flesh is that raw life force not controlled by God the Holy Spirit. Even though I was a professing Christian when I was a young man my flesh controlled me for the most part. I was a slave to my fleshly lusts. I was wild or uncontrollable. I did what my lusts wanted me to do. There is something pleasurable being under the power of lusts or the flesh. But the pleasure received by satisfying ones lusts does not bring true happiness or satisfaction. In my case after I sinned or let my flesh control me there was always guilt. But that feeling of wildness when I was young is something I sometimes miss. I am now total brain. I have lost awareness of my body. There is no dance movement in my soul. I am like a block of stone. My body does not know or is aware of the cosmic flow all around me. I do not know how to feel the movements of Nature or flesh. My mind controls me. Common sense controls me. I am a spiritual man meaning I am controlled by the Holy Spirit. But there are times I would like to feel wild. Maybe what I want to experience is pure joy. I want to rejoice in the wildness of God. I suppose there are somethings an old man can never experience again. I will never again experience pure wildness.

So it is a Sunday in the flow of Time. I suppose today I will read my books and sit in silence.

"[31] Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;
[32] And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
[33] They answered him, We be Abraham's seed, and were never in bondage to any man: how sayest thou, Ye shall be made free?
[34] Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.
[35] And the servant abideth not in the house for ever: but the Son abideth ever.
[36] If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed." John 8:31-36
  • Current Mood
    contemplative contemplative

Kollen Park Lake Macatawa

This morning I took Rudy for a walk at Kollen Park. It has been months since we have taken any walks at Kollen Park. During the Winter months it is impossible to walk at Kollen Park due to the heavy snow. When I arrived at the city park I noticed the walkways were free of snow and ice. I walked Rudy as far as I could. I turned around when the batteries in my camera died.

When Rudy and I got home there was a message from my wife on our telephone answering machine. I called Carol and talked to her for a few minutes. She got up around 1 o'clock AM with baby Mae.

Well not much else to report. I will soon be into the afternoon hours. I will read my books and sit in silence.

Kollen Park

Kollen Park

Kollen Park

Kollen Park
  • Current Mood
    contemplative contemplative

speaking in tongues

It is 4:43 PM Sunday early evening. Outside it is lightly snowing. I have been reading my books and watching the birds.

This afternoon I was reading my Keener commentary on Acts and remembered a dream I had the other night that I forgot to mention. I will quote from my paper diary what I wrote this afternoon.

"It is 12:23 PM as I was reading Craig Keener on Acts I remembered that I had a dream the other night where I was speaking in tongues-the reason I was speaking in tongues in my dream was that the only way I could communicate divine truth was in tongues-ecstatic speech-while I was having this spiritual dream I could hear myself as I slept speaking in tongues out loud-I am sure if Carol had been sleeping next to me I would have woke her up."

"And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit give them utterance" Acts 2:4

"Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that been freely given to us by God. These things we also speak, not in words which man's wisdom teaches but which the Holy Spirit teaches, comparing spiritual things with spiritual" 1 Corinth. 2:12,13
  • Current Music
    Moonface "Julia With Blue Jeans On"