January 30th, 2014

play Ping-Pong with Henry Miller

It is 12:19 PM Thursday in the snow flow. The day has gotten away from me.

I got up this morning around 6:30 AM. I usually get up when I know I am not dreaming but thinking. During the early hours of the morning there comes a time inside my head when I know my dreams are not dreams but me thinking about some problem.

So I got up made a pot of coffee and then messed with our main computer. After messing with our main computer I wrote in my paper diary.

Carol called me around 9 o'clock AM to pick her up. Carol told me when I picked her up that we should go grocery shopping this morning, because tomorrow it is suppose to be bad weather a terrible snow storm. So we went grocery shopping this morning. So has gone by my middle-class life thus far today. Carol went to bed around Noon today. It amazes me how she worked all night and stay up till Noon. I am married to a tough woman.

Last night I read "A Fanatic Heart: Selected Stories Of Edna O'Brien" and watched television for an hour. I went to bed around 10 o'clock PM last night. Early to bed and early to bed makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. I went to bed early because I felt wasted. Old age is a wasting disease.

Yesterday I basically read my books all day. In the mail I received a book I had ordered new titled, "My Life In Middlemarch" memoir by Rebecca Mead. The novel "Middlemarch" by George Eliot is one of my favorite novels. In this book Mead writes about her love for the novel "Middlemarch" and how it effected her life. I need to someday reread "Middlemarch".

So here I sit feeling slightly out of it. Yesterday I mentioned that I found a used novel by Herbert Gold at a nearby thrift store. I failed to mention that I have another book by Gold given to me by my wife on our 15th Wedding Anniversary 1994 titled, "Bohemia: Digging The Roots Of Cool." On the back cover of this book is a description of this book "Bohemia"-

"The dream of bohemia offers a way of life whose times has come again. Look around you-the pleasures of a life of art, angst, love, and strong coffee endure and are everywhere.

Wander with Gold into a Left Bank Party in the fifties to meet William S. Burroughs and Allen Ginsberg; sit in a coffee house in Jerusalem just after the October War and argue politics; get picked up by Anais Nin at a poets' party in Chinatown; play Ping-Pong with Henry Miller; stumble across some acid-inspired street theater of the sixties in San Francisco; or meet heavy-mental musicians (whom he calls terrorist poets) in Manhattan's East Village."

Well I suppose I will close to wander through the afternoon hours. These days I need it to be super quiet. There is no way of escape.
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    I Break Horses "Chiaroscuro"

walk in love

It is now in the arctic ice flow 4:47 PM Thursday evening. I am down in the lower level reading once again Richard Baxter's treatise "The Divine Life".

I laid down for two hours this afternoon. Now I am awake reading some good old 17th century English Puritan devotional literature. This morning when we were grocery shopping at a local grocery store I saw a young woman I knew when she was a little girl at a church we once attended many years ago. The years are speeding by! It always bothers me profoundly when I go through periods when I feel dead inside spiritually. I want to FEEL a burning love for the Lord Jesus Christ. I want to FEEL close to our heavenly Father. I want to FEEL the power of God the Holy Spirit in me. I want to FEEL the assurance that when I leave this earth I will be in Heaven with God, the saints and the elect angels.

I tell myself these periods of spiritual desolation will pass in time. Now I am to live by faith in God's Word the Bible. Trust and obey there is no other way to be happy in Jesus.

Well I will close to go make a fresh pot of coffee. Tomorrow will soon be here.

"[1] Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children;
[2] And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.
[3] But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints;
[4] Neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting, which are not convenient: but rather giving of thanks.
[5] For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.
[6] Let no man deceive you with vain words: for because of these things cometh the wrath of God upon the children of disobedience.
[7] Be not ye therefore partakers with them.
[8] For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord: walk as children of light:
[9] (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth;)
[10] Proving what is acceptable unto the Lord.
[11] And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.
[12] For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done of them in secret.
[13] But all things that are reproved are made manifest by the light: for whatsoever doth make manifest is light.
[14] Wherefore he saith, Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light.
[15] See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,
[16] Redeeming the time, because the days are evil." Ephesians Chapter 5:1-16

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