Terminated account #2
It is now going on 2 o'clock pm Thursday afternoon. I thought what I would do for history sake is write a more fuller account of what took place this morning when I was "terminated".
This morning around 11 o'clock am I was standing by the Egg Loader doing my job when the head C.E.O. Bob came up to me and said he wanted to talk to me about my problems with work. I thought how nice that Bob cared about me and wanted me to be happy doing my job.
I said we could talk by the loader so I could make sure the egg processing machine does not get jammed. Bob said No he rather have us talk in Sharon's office (the head manager) privately. I thought how nice we can sit down in a quiet room and talk about the horrible work conditions of the Egg Division. How we have been since Sharon took over the job of manager of the Egg Division it has been a living nightmare working for the Egg Division.
As Bob and I walked to the office I told him everybody in the egg processing plant had their eyes on us and must think I am some kind of deep trouble since the C.E.O. is going to sit down and help me do my job better.
When we got to Sharon's office I immediately knew I was going to get fired because a big burly South Haven police officer was standing in the room along with another head manager named Medley.
I ordered by the police officer to sit down and to listen to Bob the head C.E.O. list the reasons why I was being terminated. I do not know the reasons why I was kicked out by the Beast? I think it was because what I said yesterday to Sharon and the plant boss about the nature of Reality that I was terminated.
Bob said what I said to Sharon was an act of violence. I was too aggressive and did not set forth my disagreements with the egg pit in a correct manner. Something like that. I basically told the burly cop, the C.E.O. and Medley that I love God and want to do His will. I suppose since I refuse to bow to the Beast it is time to leave. I can no longer work at the Egg Division, because it is become hostile to biblical Christianity.
So I got my lunch pall and shook hands with everyone and said "May the Lord bless".
I think I was in Sharon's office being interrogated for 20 minutes maybe more. I must confess I was a little shaken by the experience of a cop waiting for me to pull out a gun and go ballistic (that is the word Carol used "ballistic"). I told everyone in the room I am a man of peace and do not own a gun. I do not have a knife on me. I am not a mad bomber. I love people and want to serve the Lord Jesus. I have worked 14 years at the Egg Division because I am a lover of God. Bob, Medley and the big police officer looked at me like I was insane. The cop walked up to me and asked me "Are you depressed?" I answered "I have been depressed since the day I was born."
I told the people around me who were wanting to terminate me "I am a melancholy person."
The police officer suggested I seek medical help for my depression. I told him the Lord is my strength. The Lord keeps me going. Why fill myself up with drugs? Why depend on drugs to feel happy when the Lord is suppose to be my source of joy? Bob, Medley and the cop looked at me with boredom. Just get rid of sick-o is what I read in their faces.
I was told my cop to never come back to the Hamilton Farm Bureau-Egg Division. If I did I would be arrested and thrown in jail. Bob and Medley agreed with the punishment for being an outspoken Christian saint. The Beast does not want me to pollute her ground with my presence. I assured the police officer I am a lover of God and man. I do not have an arsenal of deadly weapons.
I told the Egg Division secretary to mail me my last pay check since the Beast has forbidden me to come near its den. I also shook her hand and said "May the Lord bless".
I was home from the egg pit this morning by 11:50 am Carol immediately knew the show was over. So now it is 2:32 pm and people at work must be wondering where is Jonny the voice of the common man?
It is June 24th Sunday evening and I thought I would add something to the historical record of how I got terminated last week Thursday the first day of Summer 2007 which was the 21st.
I keep trying to remember what I said that got me terminated? I remember Wednesday at work we were coming to the end of another work shift. We had been doing skids of eggs for over an hour. I had been told by Quai (?) we were shutting down at 5 o'clock pm. So around 4:55 pm I start taking back the skids back into the cooler. I was sick and exhausted and was looking forward to going home finally. I should have called in sick all week, but didn't because we were short on man power. Well Quai comes into the cooler and commands me to keep working past 5 o'clock pm. Well I exploded and yell twice "Fuck You!" "I am calling in sick tomorrow". When I came out of the cooler Quai commanded me to go with him to Sharon's office with my complains. At first I thought he was kidding but I decided to tell her since I was sick of being mistreated. She had been working us to the state of exhaustion for months. I was tired of her management style.
We got into her office around 5:05 pm and I told her how upset I was about the long hours. I told her the same things I had told her twice before. I felt I could tell her how upset I was because she had told me several times to feel free to unload my frustrations to her anytime and not to refrain.
Now I think what got me terminated were these remarks. I told her that I think she was hired to be managered because Bob the head C.E.O. knew she would be ruthless and work us to death. That she would do anything to make money for the egg pit, even work us to the breaking point.
I said the reason why Bob fired Doug was that he wanted someone who would run the Egg Division the way he wanted it run. Bob hired Sharon because she would follow orders. Doug and Bernie had ran the egg division for so many years and now it was time for a change. So Bob got rid of Doug and Bernie took an early retirement. Bob got Sharon to run the egg pit because she would follow his orders and not do it her way.
The point is I think I was terminated because of my remarks about Bob the C.E.O.. I think it was all personal and not based on anything I did or said.
I was only in Sharon's office from 5 o'clock till 5:25 pm. Most of the time I listened to Sharon list all the reasons why we had to work such long hours. I reminded her again she had told me several times she would hire High School kids to replace me a couple times a week. She told me that this summer I could work 31 hours if I wanted. To me she went back on her word. Why should I think she really cared about me or anyone else working for the egg division?
I told her I understood her position, but did not agree with it. I told them I would work, but not stop ranting and raving. I also told Quai that I did not think he cared about me or anyone else. All he cared about was following orders or as he often told me "getting the orders out".
As a Christian we must be truthful no matter the cost. I do not believe I said anything untrue to my understanding. I acknowledge I have my views and do not consider them perfect. I work with a limited amount of information. I am also not a businessman. I do not know the inner workings of the egg business. I do not take seriously the dead american world. To be it is all absurd in the end.
I do not remember yelling at Sharon. But I do know people find me threatening. I did tell Sharon that I think she likes being a manager because she likes the feelings of power. Now was that a bad thing to say to her? Well it was just my observation and was not to be taken to be a gospel truth. Did my remarks offend her? Maybe? But was it morally wrong for me to share my thoughts with her about her lust for power and attention? I do not know? Right now it is all water over the bridge. What has been done has been done. Now it is time to go on to the next stage on the journey of spiritual development.
I was seriously planning on retiring the end of the year. I would have like to have left the egg pit on my own terms. I do not like to think that the Beast got his way, but in the end the saints will rule the new heavens and new earth with the Lord Jesus.
I do think the C.E.O. should have given me a warning before terminating me. But all the folks he as terminated lately at the egg division he has just thrown them out without redress.
Well I do not know what else to add to the historical record so I will close. I do think I could have displayed more self-control last week, but I had been sick and was exhausted and lost it. I tried to explain that to those who terminated me, but they wanted to get rid of me. They wanted to silence the preaching of the Truth. They were sick of hearing me howl and moan from exhaustion.
music: Allen Ginsberg reading his poem “Howl”
From the poem “Howl” by Allen Ginsberg
What sphinx of cement and aluminum bashed open
their skulls and ate up their brains and imagi-
Moloch! Solitude! Filth! Ugliness! Ashcans and unob
tainable dollars! Children screaming under the
stairways! Boys sobbing in armies! Old men
weeping in the parks!
Moloch! Moloch! Nightmare of Moloch! Moloch the
loveless! Mental Moloch! Moloch the heavy
judger of men!
Moloch the incomprehensible prison! Moloch the
crossbone soulless jailhouse and Congress of
sorrows! Moloch whose buildings are judgment!
Moloch the vast stone of war! Moloch the stun-
Moloch whose mind is pure machinery! Moloch whose
blood is running money! Moloch whose fingers
are ten armies! Moloch whose breast is a canni-
bal dynamo! Moloch whose ear is a smoking
Moloch whose eyes are a thousand blind windows!
Moloch whose skyscrapers stand in the long
streets like endless Jehovahs! Moloch whose fac-
tories dream and croak in the fog! Moloch whose
smokestacks and antennae crown the cities!
Moloch whose love is endless oil and stone! Moloch
whose soul is electricity and banks! Moloch
whose poverty is the specter of genius! Moloch
whose fate is a cloud of sexless hydrogen!
Moloch whose name is the Mind!
Moloch in whom I sit lonely! Moloch in whom I dream
Angels! Crazy in Moloch! Cocksucker in
Moloch! Lacklove and manless in Moloch!
Moloch who entered my soul early! Moloch in whom
I am a consciousness without a body! Moloch
who frightened me out of my natural ecstasy!
Moloch whom I abandon! Wake up in Moloch!
Light streaming out of the sky!
Moloch! Moloch! Robot apartments! invisible suburbs!
skeleton treasuries! blind capitals! demonic
industries! spectral nations! invincible mad
houses! granite cocks! monstrous bombs!
They broke their backs lifting Moloch to Heaven! Pave-
ments, trees, radios, tons! lifting the city to
Heaven which exists and is everywhere about
Visions! omens! hallucinations! miracles! ecstasies!
gone down the American river!
Dreams! adorations! illuminations! religions! the whole
boatload of sensitive bullshit!
Breakthroughs! over the river! flips and crucifixions!
gone down the flood! Highs! Epiphanies! De-
spairs! Ten years' animal screams and suicides!
Minds! New loves! Mad generation! down on
the rocks of Time!
Real holy laughter in the river! They saw it all! the
wild eyes! the holy yells! They bade farewell!
They jumped off the roof! to solitude! waving!
carrying flowers! Down to the river! into the