be not a gnostic

It is 12:51 PM Friday afternoon here where we live out our allotted days. It is 42 degrees today and ugly gray. It is predicted to snow this weekend. Winter is once again upon us.

I got up this morning around 6:45 AM. I got up made a fresh pot of coffee and messed with our main computer. After messing with our main computer I ate breakfast and then wrote in my paper diary. After writing in my diary I read from a book titled, 'Christ's Prayer Before His Passion-Expository Sermons on John 17' Volume 1 by Anthony Burgess. As I was reading these sermons soaked in 17th century English Puritan Spirituality I started falling asleep, so I quit reading and dozed in my easy chair till 11 o'clock AM. I woke myself around 11 o'clock AM and decided to go buy myself a take home pizza for lunch. So I left to get a pizza and while out I visited two local thrift stores to look at their used books. I bought these used books today for our library-

'In America' A Novel by Susan Sontag

'Vedic Mathematics' by Jagadguru Swami Sri

'The Third Reich' A Novel by Roberto Bolano Translated From The Spanish By Natasha Wimmer

'The True Story of Hansel and Gretel' A Novel by Louise Murphy

'Tess of the D'Urbervilles' A Novel by Thomas Hardy

'The Vorrh' Fantasy Fiction by B. Catling

'The Outer Lands: A Natural History Guide to Cape Cod, Martha's Vineyard, Nantucket, Block Island, and Long Island' by Dorothy Sterling illustrated by Winifed Lubell

When I got home it was a little past Noon. I ate pizza and then wrote some more of my paper diary. Now I am writing in my online diaries. Existence keeps decaying. Since I am falling asleep I will close to drift and wait for my wife to call me from out West in Denver CO.
  • Current Music
    Wayarer 'Romance with Violence'

Preparing My November 2020 Diary & Thursday Reads



Preparing My November 2020 Diary & Thursday Reads

Bible/The First Book of Samuel/Old Testament

'1-2 Samuel, 1-2 Kings, 1-2 Chronicles' Old Testament V [Reformation Commentary On Scripture] Edited By Derek Cooper & Martin J.Lohrmann

'The Infatuations' A Novel by Javier Marias

'A Heart So White' A Novel by Javier Marias

'When Nietzsche Wept' A Novel Of Obsession' by Irvin D. Yalom

'Christ's Prayer Before His Passion: Expository Sermons on John 17' Volume 1 by Anthony Burgess (17th cent. English Puritan Reprint)

LiveJournal Online Journal Community Paperexpression-
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As the life of a flower,
As a breath or a sigh,
So the years that we live
As a dream hasten by;
True, today we are here,
But tomorrow may see
Just a grave in the vale,
And a memory of me.

Refrain

As the life of a flower,
As a breath, or a sigh,
So the years glide away,
And alas, we must die.

As the life of a flower,
Be our lives pure and sweet;
May we brighten the way
For the friends that we greet;
And sweet incense arise,
From our hearts as we live
Close to Him who doth teach
Us to love and forgive.

Refrain

While we tarry below
Let us trust and adore
Him who leads us each day
Tow’rd the radiant shore
Where the sun never sets,
And the flowers never fade,
Where no sorrow or death
May its borders invade.

Refrain
  • Current Music
    Anna von Hausswolff 'All Thoughts Fly'

if eternal life be to know God, then this is eternal death not to know God

It is 12:03 PM Thursday afternoon here in West Michigan. It is 44 degrees and gray outside, plain ugly weather.

I got up this morning around 6:45 AM. I got up made a pot of coffee and messed with our main computer. After messing with our main computer I wrote in my paper diary and ate something for a morning meal. Next I read for awhile sermons on Chapter 17 by Anthony Burgess. I got tired of reading so I dozed to 10 o'clock AM. I woke myself up and made a decision to leave the house to visit thrift stores Northside in search of used books to add to our library. I found these used books this morning-

'Mary Todd Lincoln: A Biography' by Jean H. Baker

'Washington' An abridgment in one volumes By Richard Harwell of the seven volume George Washington By Douglas Southall Freeman

'Collected Stories of William Faulkner'

'The Infatuations' A Novel by Javier Marias

'France: The Tragic Years-An Eyewitness Account Of War, Occupation And Liberation' by Sisley Huddleston

'The Whole of Their Lives: Communism in America-A Personal History and Intimate Portrayal of its Leaders' by Benjamin Gitlow With a Foreword by Max Eastman
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benjamin_Gitlow

'Back To Blood' A Novel by Tom Wolfe

'Shark' A Novel by Will Self

'The Wives Of Henry VIII' biography by Antonia Fraser

'Rabbit Is Rich' A Novel by John Updike

These are the used books I found this morning at thrift stores. I came home ate lunch and received a phone call from Carol. So has gone by Time thus far. All can do is keep going and pray for a divine miracle.
  • Current Music
    Pallbearer 'Forgotten Days

a heavenly frame of mind

It is 1:14 PM Wednesday afternoon in the flow of existence. Here in West Michigan it is a cold, windy, sunny day. It is good to see the sun after a spell of long dark rainy days.

I got up this morning around 6:40 AM. I got up made a pot of coffee and ate a bowl of cereal for breakfast. After breakfast I messed with our computer and then wrote in my paper diary. Next after writing in my paper diary I read Anthony Burgess Sermons on Chapter 17 of The Gospel of John.

I also read this morning a couple of chapters of The First Book of Samuel in the Bible/Old Testament. Now we are in the afternoon hours. I am still not able to focus on anything. I am exhausted mentally and spiritually.

Last night I do not remember presently. I think last night I basically sat and waited to go to bed at 11 o'clock PM. Carol did call me around 9:40 PM. All I attempted to read last night was from a book titled, 'Writing Politics: An Anthology' Edited By David Bromwich.

Well I suppose I will close to feel sick and exhausted. Tomorrow is a Thursday in the death flow.
  • Current Mood
    exhausted exhausted

Moonface 'The Queen of Both Darkness and Light'



I will come to bend my knee
But I will stay for the way you need
Me to stay your soul

I never planned to be this shitty singer
Come slither through your door
I always planned to be something
A little bit more
You never planned to be the Queen
Of both darkness and light
But a spirit that is free
Is a spirit that has always been
Deaf and dumb and blind

So I will come to bend my knee
But I will stay for the way you need
Me to stay your soul

I remember the first time I drove away from you in this world
I was in a taxi and you had a soccer ball
And I looked back and you bounced it on the road
And you looked sad and broke my heart
But that was the last time that I'll ever leave without you
Knowing exactly when I am coming back

For I have tried to be a free spirit but I just can't
So from now on just trust that
I will come to bend my knee
But I will stay for the way you need
Me to stay your soul
  • Current Mood
    exhausted exhausted

Moonface - "Headed For The Door" (Official Video)



She was only 23 or she was only 24
I headed for the door

She was looking through old photos on the floor
And I headed for the door

I had seen her move this way once before
And I headed for the door
I headed for the door

And she was searching for an answer but the answer was a war
I headed for the door
I headed for the door
And I headed for the door
I headed for the door

And there was blood and there was gore
I headed for the door

There was some ugly shit in store
I headed for the door

There was a forest on fire inside her
There was no reason to give to the poor
And if you think the road is dangerous
Then of course it is
You gotta listen for the cautionary roar
I headed for the door
I headed for the door
I headed for the door
And I headed for the door

Dear Sarah
I heard that you’ve turned into a goth, and I think that’s great, if that’s what makes you happy. I have an old pair of black boots with silver buckles that I don’t wear anymore and you can have them if you want them. Also, I wanted to ask: What, if anything, is fluttering in your heart? I wanted to ask if it has to be a black crow or a vampire bat... Or if maybe instead it could be a kite that has broken loose from the string that you were holding—or the string that we were holding—sometime when we were teenagers, or maybe in our early twenties? Could it be a kite which is now rolling over and over on itself in the sky like an unborn baby, and slowly shrinking into a dot, and then a speck of black, and then something we’re not even sure we’re watching, but then, for sure absolutely nothing at all? Get back to me about this when you have a chance. I hope you’re doing well
Xo
S
  • Current Mood
    exhausted exhausted

Moonface - "Barbarian" (Official Video)



You were crying, for sure
And you hair was only adding to the flood
Just out of the shower
You looked like a red bird

I am a barbarian, sometimes
Been a barbarian, most of my life

Stop me if you're heard this one before
You're a babe when you're naked on the floor
You're a babe in the woods
And the rain is on its way

And I am a barbarian, sometimes
Been a barbarian,
most of my life

But sometimes,
sometimes
I'm a lamb upon your altar
I'm just a lamb when I recall
How I asked you
Where you want to be buried
And you asked me the name
Of the town where I was born
Of the town where I was born
La da-da da da da

Darling it's finally the Fall
Finally I've not destroyed anything at all

You never knew
'cause I never told you
You never knew
'cause I never told you
You never knew
'cause I never told you
  • Current Music
    Moonface 'Julia With Blue Jeans On'

the philosophical misuse of language

It is in the flow of existence 3:55 PM late Tuesday morning. It has been a cold rainy gray day. Hope tomorrow is a dry day.

I got up this morning around 6:45 AM. I took in our old van for an oil change this morning. While waiting for the oil change to be done I sat in a lounge and read some more of a novel titled, 'When Nietzsche Wept' A Novel Of Obsession by Irvin D. Yalom.

When I got home from getting our van's oil changed I wrote in my paper diary and filmed a video for my Youtube channel. I really have done nothing much all day. I wrote several pages in my paper diary and read, 'When Nietzsche Wept' A Novel Of Obsession by Irvin D. Yalom.

I am waiting for Carol to call me from out West.

Last night I do not remember right now. I suppose I will close to wait it out.
  • Current Music
    Anna von Hauswolff 'All Thoughts Fly'